What’s a good sign that someone is just using you? (reddit)

The relationship feels unbalanced and unequal, with you giving more than you are receiving. In a good relationship, friendship, whatever, both people are giving what they want to give without coercion and both feel adequately rewarded for it. Sometimes one person needs more, sometimes the other, but it evens out over time. When you feel like you’re being coerced into giving more than you really want, whether that’s with force or emotional manipulation or whatever, you’re being used and you’ll eventually resent it.


This kinda reminds me of a quote I read somewhere: A good relationship is 60/40 with each person trying to be the one giving 60%.


All these answers about food here, but I’ve had a friend for years who was in a worse financial situation than me and I’d be buying her food when we go out and event tickets and more expensive gifts. But she’d cook for us when we hung out at her house and made me handmade gifts.

Now she has a better paying job and after her first paycheck, she tried to buy me a thing I mentioned wanting a while back.

I know I contributed more financially, but she contributed the same if not more in terms of emotional support so I think it’s a good friendship.


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